before you arrive

dear baby,

your pregnancy has flown by, seemingly in a single instant. whether by my own busyness or the speed of days at this point in my life, it feels as though we just found out about your existence, but now your arrival is imminent! we couldn't be happier to welcome you into our family...you'll make us four! four! the thought makes me full of so much joy and so many nerves i can hardly contain it. it's hard to believe we'll be four, when it feels like not too long ago that i was just one.

carrying you has been a joy and a pleasure. i've said it before and i'll say it again; growing and bringing babies into this world is my very favourite thing i have the priveledge of doing. it's a miracle to watch my body expand and grow all on it's own, without me telling it to do a single thing, as it makes way for your growth and development. i'm now more pregnant than i've ever been, because your big brother was born almost three full weeks early. i'm starting to feel achy and sleeping is getting harder to do, but i guess that is natures way of preparing me for our nights together once you're on the outside. i really have nothing to complain about. my body has accommodated your growth and i feel strong, healthy and happy. i love laying in bed at night and feeling you wriggle and kick inside me. your big brother thinks he can see you, talk to you and feed you through my belly button...it's pretty cute.

i can't say i really have a single inkling about your gender. by the end of ollies pregnancy, daddy had me fairly convinced that his thought was right and the baby was a boy. this time around, neither of us are sure, so i'm excited for what feels like a real surprise, though, once you come along, it will feel like it was always you. i'm looking forward to that...the instant familiarity when i meet you for the "first" time. we've known eachother all along, haven't we baby?

see you soon, sweet baby. we're so excited.